Sunday, May 30, 2004

MeEtInGs

Went to Tampines Mall and Century Square today.. Saw my primary school friend Tuty at TM Isetan, and Danial 1E2 also at Isetan.. Both also at the shoe section.. Coincidental..

Saturday, May 29, 2004

JoKeZ

Ummm... Jokes anyone?


- Jokes / Got Any Gwapes? -

A duck walks into a corner store and asked the cashier, "You got any gwapes?" The cashier looks at him and says, "No, we ain't got no gwapes". Then the duck left. The next day the duck came back and asked the cashier, "You got any gwapes?" The cashier looks at him and says, "No, we ain't got no gwapes". Then the duck left. The next day the same duck went back to the same corner store and said, "You got any gwapes?" The cashier said, "No, we ain't got no gwapes and if you ask again I'll staple your feet to the floor". The next day the duck came back and said, "You got any staples?" The cashier looked around and said, "No". Then the duck said, "You got any gwapes?"




- Jokes / Ancient Writings -

A team of archaeologists was excavating in Israel when they came upon a cave. Written on the wall of the cave were the following symbols in order of appearance: 1. A woman 2. A donkey 3. A shovel 4. A fish 5. A Star of David They decided that this was a unique find and the writings were at least more than 3,000 years old. They chopped out the piece of stone and had it brought to the museum where archaeologists from all over the world came to study the ancient symbols. They held a huge meeting after months of conferences to discuss what they could agree was the meaning of the markings. The president of their society stood up and pointed at the first drawing and said, "This looks like a woman. We can judge that this race was family oriented and held women in high esteem. You can also tell they were intelligent, as the next symbol resembles a donkey, so, they were smart enough to have animals help them till the soil. The next drawing looks like a shovel of some sort, which means they even had tools to help them. Even further proof of their high intelligence is the fish, which means that if they had a famine hit the earth, whereby the food didn't grow, they would take to the sea for food. The last symbol appears to be the Star of David, which means they were evidently Hebrews." The audience applauded enthusiastically, and the president smiled and said, "I'm glad to see that you are all in full agreement with our interpretations." Suddenly a little old man stood up in the back of the room and said, "I object to every word. The explanation of what the writings say is quite simple. First of all, everyone knows that Hebrews don't read from left to right, but from right to left. Now, look again. It now says: "Holy Mackerel, Dig The Ass On That Woman."





- Jokes / Wanna Buy A Toothbrush? -

There were three men trying to get the same job. There was Adam, Brandon, and Cameron. They had 3 days to sell as many toothbrushes they could. After the 1st Day, Adam had sold 20, Brandon 15, and Cameron sold 1. Brandon said, "I'd try harder tommorrow." to Carter. The next day, Adam had sold 45, Brandon 38, and Cameron 15. Then Adam told Cameron, "Tommorrow's last day, you better do really good." The last day, Adam sold 567, Brandon 472, and Cameron 1,594. Amazed, Adam asked, "How'd you sell that many toothbrushes?" Cameron replied, "Well, I put up a sign that said FREE PIE! Whenever someone would take a bite, they'd say, this tastes like shit. I'd reply, "Why, it is, want to by a toothbrush?"





- Jokes / The Canables -

Three men who were lost in the forest were captured by cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could live if they pass a trial. The first step of the trial was to go to the forest and get 100 pieces of the same kind of fruit. With that, the three men went their separate ways to gather fruits. The first one came back and said to the king, "I brought ten apples." The king then explained the trial to him. "You have to shove the fruits up your butt without any expression on your face or you'll be eaten." The first apple went in... but on the second one he winced out in pain, so he was killed. The second one arrived and showed the king ten cherries. When the king explained the trial to him he thought to himself, this should be easy. 1...2...3........96...97...98... and on the 99th berry he burst out in laughter and was killed. The first guy and the second guy met in heaven. The first one asked, "Why did you laugh, you almost got away with it?" The second one replied, "I couldn't help it, I saw the third guy coming with durians."


- Jokes / The Goldfish -

Little Timmy was in the garden filling a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the child was up to, he politely asked, "What are you up to there, Tim?" "My goldfish died," replied Timmy tearfully, "and I've just buried him." The neighbor was concerned. "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?" Little Timmy patted down the last heap of earth and replied, "That's because he's inside your cat."

DiCtIoNaRy


- Dictionary (the real definitions) -





Adult \a-dult\ n. : a person who has stopped growing at both ends and now does in the middle


Agony \ahg-on-ee\ n. : a one-armed man hanging off a cliff with itchy balls


Beauty Parlor \beu-tee par-ler\ n. : a place where women curl up and dye


Babysitting \bay-bee-sih-ting\ - an excuse to play little kid games


Boy \boi\ n. : a noise with dirt on it


Cannibal \can-a-bul\ n. : someone who is fed up with people


Caramel Apple \care-uh-mell ahhpul\ n. : cavities on a stick


Chicken \chik-on\ n. : the only animals people eat before they are born and after they are dead


Committee \com-ih-tee\ n. : a body that keeps minutes and wastes hours


Dust \dust\ n. : mud with the juice squeezed out


Etc: an abbreviation made to trick people into believing that you know more than you really do


Flashlight \flash-lite\ n. : a case for holding dead batteries


Frown \frowwn\ n. : an upside-down smile


Gossip \goss-ip\ n. : a person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage


Homework \home-werk\ n. : a punishment given to students every day to prevent them from having lives of their own


Lottery \lot-er-ee\ n. : a tax on people who are bad at math


Morning \mor-ning\ n. : a period of time nonexistent during weekends


Mosquito \muss-kee-toe\ n. : an insect that makes you appreciate flies more


Night \nite\ n. : daytime with the lights out


Oops : the sound made by a teenager who comes home two hours after curfew


Raisin \ray-son\ n. : a grape with a sunburn


School \skool\ n. : prison-like place with no free meals


Secret \see-cret\ n. : something that people aren't supposed to know but everyone eventually finds out


Skeleton \skel-eh-ton\ n. : a series of bones with the person scraped off of them


Tomorrow \too-mar-oh\ n. : one of the greatest labor saving devices of today


Yawn \yawwn\ n. : an honest opinion being openly expressed


Yesterday \yes-ter-day\ n. : when the ten-page paper that you started tonight was due

How To Bother People At The Mall


- How To / Bother People At The Mall -






  • Ride mechanical ponys with coins fished out of the reflecting pond.

  • Try pants on backwards at the Gap. Ask the salesperson if they make your butt look big.

  • At the bottom of an escalator, scream "MY SHOELACES! AHHHHH!"

  • Teach pet store parrots curses and swears.

  • Ask mall cops for stories of World War I.

  • Pretend to be a fashion dummy in clothes stores, occasionally screaming without warning.

  • Test mattresses in your pajamas.

  • Stare at static on a display tv and challenge other shoppers whether they, too, can see the "hidden picture".

  • Ask an appliance person if they have any tvs that play
    only in Spanish.

  • Ask a salesperson in the hardware department how well a
    particular saw cuts through the human bone.

  • Hula dance by the demonstration air conditioner.

  • Sneak up on saleswomen at the perfume counter and spray 'them' with your own bottle of Eau de Swanke.

  • Rummage through the jelly bean bin at the candy store, insisting that you lost a contact lens.

  • Ask a saleswoman whether a particular shade of panties matches the color of your beard.

  • In the changing rooms, sing, "Baa baa Black Sheep"

  • Leave on the plastic string connecting a new pair of
    shoes, and wander around the mall taking two-inch steps.

  • Record belches on electronic sampling keyboards, and perform gastric versions of Jingle Bells for admiring onlookers.

  • "Toast" plastic gag hot dogs in front of the fake fireplace display.

  • Collect stacks of paint brochures and hand them out as religious tracts.

  • Ask the information desk for a stroller, and for someone to push you around in it.

  • Change every tv in the electronics department to a station showing Spongebob. Sing the theme song in a robotic voice, and scream if anyone tries to switch channels on one of the sets.

  • Hand a stack of pants back to the changing room attendant and scornfully announce that none of them are "leakproof".

  • Stand transfixed in front of a mirror bobbing your head up and down.

  • Pay for all your purchases with two-dollar notes, or even better, one dollar coins!

  • Try on flea collars at the pet store while occasionally
    pausing to scratch yourself.

  • At the stylist, ask to have the hair on your back permed.

  • Show people your driver's license and demand to know "whether they've seen this man/woman."

  • Buy a jawbreaker from the candy store. Return fifteen minutes later, fish it out of your mouth, and demand to know why it hasn't turned blue yet.
  • AmErIcAn IdOl

    How would you do on American Idol? by geela
    Name
    Age
    Simon saysUtterly horrible
    Paula saysMy favorite performance
    Randy saysI'm with Paula on this one
    Success levelYou make the top four
    Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!





    Haha Top Four???

    QuIz


    What Name Should You Have?


    Interesting...



    0:)


    You're the angelic smiley.


    People like you for your kind and friendly personality. You
    live every day the best you can and don't take it for granted. You are someone
    that can make someone's day a little better.




    What online smily are YOU
    ?!

    @ Radiant





    I'm a Perfect Girlfriend huh?
    You're Perfect ^^
    -Perfect- You're the perfect girlfriend. Which
    means you're rare or that you cheated :P You're
    the kind of chick that can hang out with your
    boyfriend's friends and be silly. You don't
    care about presents or about going to fancy
    placed. Hell, just hang out. You're just happy
    being around your boyfriend.
    What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?
    brought to you by Quizilla




    YOU RAN OVER A SMALL CHILD AND LEFT HIM TO DIE!!!


    what's YOUR deepest secret?
    brought to you by Quizilla





    What Pattern Are You?



    Take the M&M's Test @ /~erin



    I am a washing machine!

    what kitchen utensil are YOU?






    I am Rapunzel!

    Find your fairy tale character
    at kelly.moranweb.com.







    I'm completely down-to-earth!

    Find your soul type
    at kelly.moranweb.com



    So... what's on TV tonight?
    If you were a room in a house, what room would you be?




    movable type
    You are smart and you excel in everything you do. Life is a breeze for you. You are a very lucky person.

    Which Blogging Tool Are You?




    Take the ICQuiz!





    [huh??]
    Take the What Should Your New Year's Resolution Be? Quiz





    Are you Addicted to the Internet?

    57%



    You seem to have a healthy balance in your life when it comes to the internet and life away from the computer. You know enough to do what you want online without looking like an idiot (most of the time). You even have your own Yahoo club or online journal! But you enjoy seeing your friends and going out to enjoy life away from your computer.





    The Are you Addicted to the Internet? Quiz at Quiz Me!






    VIOLET



    You surround yourself with art and music and are constantly driven to express yourself. You often daydream. You prefer honesty in your relationships and belive strongly in your personal morals.




    Find out your color at Quiz Me!






    click to find out if you are obsessed!

    Friday, May 28, 2004

    LoVe StOrY

    haha interesting:

    _____________________________________________________
    LOVE STORY
    One sunny summer day at skool you see the most wierd creature you have ever seen. Their name is ?, and every move he makes just turns you on more and more. You nudge your best friend Hana and say, "Wow, that has to be the most irritating body I have ever seen." Suddenly, he looks in your direction and starts walking right towards you!!! He says, "I noticed you staring at me from over there. I just had to tell you, that I think you are so , and was wondering if you'd like to go to a place with me and having fun?" With a stupid smile on your face you say, "Ummm" and go with them. When you finally get to the place, he moves closer to you, and gives you the biggest kiss ever. The two of you are passionately kissing, when you feel a ?? hit you on the back of the head. You open your eyes to find out it's all a dream, but there is a note left next to your bed.

    It reads: "? is the love you've been waiting your whole life for. He will ask you out in 9 days or less, but only if you send this e-mail to at least 10 people within the next few minutes. The more people you send it to, the sooner they will ask you out, and you both fall in love. Do not take this lightly, because if you simply ignore this, you will have bad luck in love for the next 9 years!"
    _____________________________________________________

    Get Your Love Story Here!

    HaUnTeD mUsIc RoOm

    Hmm... I've heard stories that my school is haunted but I have never encountered one before.. I did encountered don't know what day, as well as yesterday.. Let me tell you the story...

    This whole thing took place in the music room.. Which is in the old technical block.. When we were singing, I heard cymbals and drums.. Actually, my 2 friends heard it first, then they told me to listen properly.. Then I heard it.. The noises seemed to come in the store room where the band members put their instruments.. The storeroom is soo near where we were standing and Some people ACROSS the room even heard it, even though it's not THAT loud! Creepy!!

    At first I thought it was the vibration of our voices.. But then the cymbals and drums played a different tune when we were singing!! The only same tune was when we sang 'Munaeru Valibaa'.

    Then this Aisyah, a friend of mine, let go of her hair and acted like a ghost. It was real realistic!! I was facing the front when I heard my friend Farhanah said 'Eeesh!".. So I look back and I saw this scary creature.. I was SOO shocked, I jumped out of my chair and gave a little squeal, and then immediately after that I sat back down again... I just had a little shock, that's why.. =S

    Then yesterday(27 May, Thursday), when we were practising again in the music room, the noises started again when we sang.. It was damn creepy!

    The choir chairman asked his friend for the truth behind the truth.. Here is our conversation:
    ______________________________________________
    Him: it is a storeroom.. and he also say its haunted.. someone hang inside..

    Me: creepy...

    Him: he also said sometimes lights spoil here and there... there's a fan in the room.. and no one knows where it cums from..
    ______________________________________________


    Oooh.. Interesting rite?!

    BuRfDaE PrEzZiE, LOTR, and a FaReWeLL

    I got an early birthday present from Diana.. It's a Heart-Shaped Necklace.. It's very nice.. Thanks Diana!

    Then in the morning we took a quiz on Lord of the Rings. The first few winners will get a bookmark(can chose wan..)
    I got 11/16... A lot of ppl got 11 so we had a tie-breaker.. I happened to win but there was only 1 bookmark left so there was no choice for me.. I got Arwen.. My form teacher say she think that I'm happy as I got Arwen.. =X

    Today is the last day I'll see my science teacher again.. I'll miss her.. She is a very fun teacher! Although she's scary sometimes!
    D0tZ.........




    What Makes You Sexy?
    by eva71
    Name/NickName
    Gender
    Sexy Body Part IsYour Hair
    Special Talents AreBlow Jobs
    Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!






    Your True Nature by llScorpiusll
    Username
    The quality that most appeals to you:Empathy
    In a survival situation, you:Act crazy as a diversion
    Your hidden talent is:Spiritual wisdom
    Your gift is:Irresistible attractiveness
    In groups, you:Work for a common goal
    Your best quality is:Your abundant energy
    Your weakness is:Your lack of focus
    Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!






    What stupid celebrity are you destined to kill? by daydreamer8852
    Name
    Birthdate
    You killed
    With a
    OnDecember 1, 2011
    Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!






    What do people really think about you?
    by Raven319
    Name
    Age
    favorite song
    Parents thinkYou're an angel
    Strangers thinkYou're hot
    Friends thinkYou need a fuck buddy
    Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!






    Who were you in a past life?
    by Kat007
    Name:
    Birthdate:
    Favorite Color:
    Country:
    You were most probably:Cleopatra
    If not then you were:Leonardo da Vinci
    Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!






    Your icon is....... by beautiful1
    Full Name
    Age
    Favorite Color
    Your icon is....
    Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!







    What is a good quote for you?
    by grlinterupted
    Name
    Color
    Say what??"If your going to get in trouble for it, you might as well do it."
    Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!




    Whats does your personality rate from 1-10? by morning_prayer
    Your first full name
    Your personality rates aeight
    your best quality isyoure pretty inside and out
    your worst quality isyoure in a clique'
    this is becauseother people influenced you
    Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!



    Hmmm... Interesting!
    Yesterday was the Swirl concert.. I did one dance step wrongly and the person beside me followed me!! Hahaha!!!


    Then after the song 'Under The Sea', Ms Lye came in to conduct us for the next few songs but the soundman stopped the CD instead of pausing it... We were standing on the stage like fools!!! The audience clapped for a few times but we did nothing else but stand and smile!!! At last we did another piece named 'The Dixieland'.
    When the combined pieces, Singapura and Munaeru Valibaa, I was standing near the drums and cymbals. It was very very VERY loud! Hahaha!! Lucky I stuffed tissue in my ear, and the sound was a bit muffled!

    Sunday, May 23, 2004

    Haiz.. I feel so sleepy .. Homework still haven't finish!!
    Have any of you heard of the Baby Blues comics? They are so cute! I think I'll post one comic every day for you all!

    Here's one:


    Hope you all can read.. I think the font is a bit too small...
    A stupid and useless quiz..

    Grover on X
    Grover on Ecstasy

    You're funny, you're loveable, you're entertaining,
    you like to call yourself "Super
    Grover!"--You're obviously on ecstasy.
    But that's why we love you. Be careful, ok?


    Which Sesame Street Muppet's Dark Secret Are You?
    brought to you by Quizilla
    Today our class will have some sort of a 'gathering' to enjoy after exams.. Too bad I'm not going.. Because I'm going out and my mother also don't let me.. Anyway, I hope they will have fun.

    Friday, May 21, 2004

    Today is so !!!H.U.M.I.D!!!!

    Hmm.. Failed my 2.4km run and my History paper.. I can't wait to get my report book back! I think I'll fail my malay..

    Sitting position back to the position before exam.. Bad luck! I get to sit beside the lame and P.......C guy!!! ARGH! But nvm.. he is 'FUN'! >.<

    Wednesday, May 19, 2004

    Got back my mid year exam papers; Art, Science, Malay, and English, Geography, and D&T[Design and Technology]... Failed Malay only.... But I got low marks for the rest.. Hehe...


    This is a fun game.. Click here...

    Me and another fern of mine got scolded by a teacher because she saw us bringing handphone.. Haiz...

    Tuesday, May 18, 2004

    This morning, went to Tampines Stadium for fitness test.. Then outside the stadium before the test start, there wass this woman who look like a girl, whom resembles a witch[serious!!]!! She's crazy and really really looked scary!!! And she chased one of my friend!! o.O She's so unlucky!!
    Oh no! I'll be coming home late every day for choir practice!! *sigh!*

    Friday, May 14, 2004

    Chatted with "Suryana's brother" and Mardiana.. It's was so fun.. We kinda 'bullied' "him"! Hahhaha.. "He's" so friendly, unlike my sister!!!! =) We battled, 2 against 1, about Galz Rulez, Guyz Sux! Diana actually have some doubt that that waz Sur's brother.. Cuz "he" knew a little too much about sum things... Hehe.. Diana's quite smart!!
    Hmm.. No flu anymore.. Fast recovery... Monday got 1st choir practice in 2 weeks.. Can't wait.. Then Tuesday got fitness test... Then Wednesday onward shool will go on normally.. =( Skool sux!
    Last paper today.. D&T... I dunno the answer to most questions in the D&T paper.. Sighz... Feeling very tired.. Must be the flu.... I'm taking a nap now...

    Signing Off

    Thursday, May 13, 2004

    Malay exam... Quite hard...
    But I'm weak in Malay so that's no surprise..

    Guess what? I got 13/20 for my Literature file. I thought it was low, but compared to my frenz, i got pretty high.. They got about 5,7,9 etc.. The highest mark in our class is 15, as far as I know...

    Wednesday, May 12, 2004

    I laughed like hell today in Art exam.. It's because of Firraihan and Jing Xiong.. Firraihan pulled in his arms and he look like a handicap person with no hands.. It's so comical! Then about Jing Xiong, I don't know what he did but teacher came up to him and 'hand-cuffed' him with his book strap.. His actions are so cute! I laughed til tears come out and stomach and jaws pain!!..

    Tuesday, May 11, 2004


    The more we learn, the more we know,
    The more we know, the more we forget,
    The more we forget, the less we know.
    Why study?
    --An old English saying


    Good point.. Why study?
    ARGHH!! Why did Jenna vote Rupert off??? After all the alliances!! Stupid thing to do.. If Jenna vote for Rob, there will be a tie-breaker game and maybe Rob will lose.. And when Rob lose, Jenna will have a higher chance of winning the million dollars!! She didn't think through carefully!
    Amber won the million dollars.. Stupid flirt! I hate Amber.. Rob too... People there are so naive.. Blinded by Rob.. But Rob is a scheming player.. I'll have to give him credit for that...
    My sister sucks big-time!

    Monday, May 10, 2004

    Had our geography exam today.. Think I will get more wrong then correct.. What I learnt didn't come out in the paper!! ARGH!! Waste my bloody time studying!

    Forgot to bring my key.. Kena locked outside.. Shouted for my grandmother but she deaf.. Didn't hear.. I called the house phone also she didn't hear... Finally I shouted my lungs out .. Finally she hear.. And I lost my voice..

    Saturday, May 08, 2004

    Exams are coming.. I dun want to fail, but I know I can't study to hard, if not I will get more stressed out, and this is what will happen to me:



    Brain explosion!

    Wednesday, May 05, 2004

    JH SUX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    ARGHHHH!!!!!!! Today we had our Lit SA[acting]..... I forgot my lines at one part! Haizz.. Then there was no Mrs Claricoates.. She too busy fiddling with the jacket.... We got 49/80... ONLY!!!

    Monday, May 03, 2004

    Try this very soon, before someone
    forces Google to fix its site:

    1) Go to www.google.com

    2) Type in- weapons (DON'T hit return/enter!)

    3) Hit the "I'm feeling lucky" button, NOT
    the "Google search"

    4) Read the "error message" carefully.

    Someone at Google has a good sense of humor and
    will probably be fired soon.



    Cheers!
    I did the English SA1 summary wrOngly!! Shoot!! Wasted 20 marks....

    Saturday, May 01, 2004

    My class is organising a event after the exams for a break. The choices are chalet[3 days 2 nitez] and Escape Theme Park in Pasir Ris.. Us students will vote to go where..

    Your Ninja Burger Name









    From this day forward your

    Ninja Burger ninja name will be



    Kiyoshi Hidari -san


    Use this name in all

    future dealings with

    Ninja Burger customers.



    Hehe cute name! Find out your Japanese name here!